Not Yet...

So, I called about my computer before I went to pick it up just to make sure it was done. Not quite yet, I was told...maybe tomorrow. I'm not going to lie and say I will be really patient. HOWEVER, as long as the only thing that is different when I pick it up is that the speakers work...I will be okay with however long it takes!

Work was quite a bit slower today than yesterday, so I did get my share of "computer time" in while I was there, but it isn't quite the same as just "chillin'" on my couch watching TV checking on things whenever I want!

Tomorrow the young adult group is having brunch after church. We haven't done anything in a LONG time (our "group" isn't really very organized and have actually only gotten together a couple times in the past two years!). It will be fun to see everyone and hopefully plan another gathering soon.

Nothing else exciting...somehow I seem to have MORE to say (even if it isn't really "anything") when I am at home than when I am not!

Well, maybe I should go home and eat dinner (see, if I could do this at home, I would have been "multi-tasking"!)

Good night :o)

Tomorrow...

I called about my computer tonight and it was pretty much done...but the person who was working on it was gone for the day. So, as long as I get off work some time before 8:30 tomorrow night I should have my computer back at home...I can hardly wait (although, I am very thankful that as far as I know I did not have any dreams about facebook OR blogs last night!)

Work was pretty darn crazy today and I'm really tired (so, again, it probably is okay to not have a computer there to distract me from going to bed as soon as I get home...even though it will likely be around 9:30!).

My Christmas tree is up and looks pretty nice, so I'll have to take a picture and post it tomorrow or Sunday. My home still isn't as "Christmasy" as most, but I think it would be different if it wasn't just me living there :o)

Prayers to all those who need them tonight.
Good night...

Not Yet

No computer back yet, but I did call to check on it. Apparently, they think it is a hardware problem and they were in the process of running some kind of scan when I called this afternoon. I was assured that they would not delete any of my files without notifying me, so hopefully that is the case because I did not back up ANYTHING before taking it to the store.

I am, however, pretty sure that I have computer issues. I woke up at 3:53 this morning because I was thirsty. However, the dream I was having before I woke up was clearly about facebook. I wrote some things down so I would remember them when I actually DID wake up. While I am planning on emailing my friend the whole crazy story which is either REALLY funny, or slightly disturbing, here is the "gist" of it. For anyone who has facebook, one of the fun things is to "update your status". What this looks like is a name in blue followed by what you are doing in black. In my dream, the "status" of one of my friends was on a HUGE screen somewhere and I was telling another friend about it (and explaining how I knew this particular friend and where she lived since they do not know each other). Yes, her name in blue followed by a long, pretty detailed "status update". The craziest part could be that some of the things written actually made sense, which doesn't always happen when you are having crazy dreams. Anyway, maybe not having a home computer for a couple days is actually a good thing!

Well, I need to go to the grocery store before choir practice...the computer place is open until 9, so I GUESS there is still a little bit of hope they could call me tonight that it is all fixed! Back to work tomorrow. I had a meeting today and it went REALLY well. I have learned SO much by being in charge of a committee at work!

Enjoy the music...I'm thinking that even when I get my computer back, I will leave the messed up songs because it adds a little character :o)

Pretty Pathetic

Yes, I HAD to stop by my parents' house this afternoon because I can't go a day without checking my email, facebook, blogs...pretty pathetic, I know! I wouldn't want to miss anything exciting during my time without a computer at home! Of course, if I was at home, I could get my Christmas decorations out (I was going to do that on Monday, but since I knew my computer was going away for a few days I just sat and stared at it all day long until I had to bring it in...wow, I probably shouldn't admit that, but just did!)

I did have a semi-productive morning, though. I took my car in to get a "winter check" which apparently was a good idea since there was a dusting of snow on the ground when I woke up. I also got an oil change and had my tires rotated.

While my car was getting worked on, I went shopping with my grandma to help her get Christmas presents for my parents. She didn't remember to wear her hearing aid, so that made shopping a little more challenging! A year ago this week there was a terrible incident that happened in one of the places we were today. It was eerie walking the paths where people lost their lives, especially when the additional security was evident. We were successful shoppers and I got a free lunch at Panera and special time with my grandma, so it was worth it :o)

Well, I suppose I should try and be productive...I have some policies and procedures to read before my meeting tomorrow and really SHOULD take out my Christmas decorations so it feels more like Christmas at my house. Maybe, just MAYBE they will have time to look at my computer, fix the problem, and I will get it back before the night is over...wishful thinking, I'm sure, but crazier things HAVE happened!

Also, now that I have been able to listen to some of my playlist...I have noticed that some of the songs get cut off before the end and at least one of them is labeled with the wrong artist...very interesting! The songs are still pretty good though and I have enjoyed listening to them at my mom and dad's...hopefully soon I can be singing to them at my own house!!

Back in the Shop

Well, I decided to take my computer back to get fixed. I enjoy listening to music too much on my computer to not be able to do that (and even though it has been less than two days the skipping and scratchiness was too much for me!). They are not sure how long it will take...I am just hoping that it is an "easy fix" like a loose wire or something that does not involve sending away for parts (or having to wipe out my system like they did back in March...it took me until last week to get my computer back to the way I liked it!)

I'm not sure what I will do without my computer (probably get a lot more done around the house!). I decided to have this post tomorrow some time (how about 10:22 AM...I like 10:22!) so it won't be like I actually missed a day. Tonight, I am going to watch my dad's first basketball game. He is coaching two seventh grade girls teams again this year (I think the "B" team plays tonight.) I get to keep score when I am able to attend. I decided to do that rather than attend a Christmas concert. It will be the first time I have missed the concert of a local artist who used to sing in the choir at my church in a long time. My parents are trying to "cut back", and I have a pile of bills that hopefully can be paid in two weeks when I get my next pay check. So, it wasn't really the best way to spend $50 this year.

However, in honor of the concert, here are the words to one of her songs (and maybe a link to part of it if the link works!). For some reason I really like it, although this is the first time I have actually read all the lyrics (I typed them as I listened to the song). I'm not QUITE ready for snowflakes, although I did see my first ones of the year on Saturday.

Snowflakes
When we begin, we play on the wind softly coming down.
When we fall, we feel so small as we look around.

When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.
When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.

As we weave our pattern in time, we're choosing a path.
Some will overcome, some will be done, we'll soon see what we have.

When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.
When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.

Tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight.

We realize a lifetime has an end.
Our face is lost as we become a part of everyone.

When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.
When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.
When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.
When our journey is done we will be as one when we reach the ground.

Remembering Poppy Joy

I've actually been "planning" this post for weeks (I know, that could be a sign that I have some "blog issues", but this time I think it is "okay"!).

It is November 25 and I am going to see how far I get with what I want to write (I have already started crying and have only typed three sentences, so it may take me a few days!). The post eventually be set to publish on December 1 at 10:26 AM.

That day, that time, because one year ago, the world was blessed with the beautiful Poppy Joy . Not to be overly dramatic, but I do not think my life would be the way it is today without that day. So many things have happened this past year that I could not have imagined, and I honestly think it began with Poppy Joy .

Prior to that day, a year ago, I had posted 75 times on my blog. I had a couple blogs that I read regularly. If I remember correctly, I had found Emily through one of them and had been blessed by her words, but had not yet met her precious Miller Grace . I had stumbled upon a couple other stories of babies born with Trisomy 18, but for whatever reason didn't really "get it". I read a post or two and carried on...not forgetting them, but apparently, that wasn't "the right time". And then, I saw a prayer request posted in a comment on one of the blogs I was reading to go to http://poppyjoy.blogspot.com and pray for this family who was about to meet their baby girl. That memory is so vivid to me that I can almost see the words. And so, I prayed, and I visited. And a few days later, I watched this video.



Prior to that day, I had seen kids die. I had sat with grieving parents, held their hands, and cried with them. However, most of those kids passed away after fighting battles, many who seemed to have fought off death more times than could be counted. They endured so much that when it came to "the end" of their life here, it was hard to believe it had actually come to that. So, this was really my first experience witnessing the joy that comes with celebrating the minutes here rather than watching the minutes slip away...

(November 26) I had been in the presence of some very "faith-filled" people. I considered myself to be a person who had a good deal of faith. However, I don't think I had ever seen anything like what I saw in that video. Through the tears, I remember thinking "wow"..."wow" was all I could think because I'm not sure there are actual words to describe the feelings that came to me (even though I "re-watched" it yesterday, that didn't really help me find the words!) (November 27) This wasn't about watching Poppy Joy die, it was about seeing her LIVE. I had never witnessed anything like that, and clearly it left a permanent impression.

Of course, since I attended college in Texas, I noticed the sweet Southern accent and was "hooked" (just kidding, but that part did make the video "extra sweet" for me :o) ).

About six weeks later, I found an email from Angie in my inbox. Now, that memory isn't quite as vivid, but I think it would be safe to say that I was surprised...and probably cried (because, you know, I'm a "crier"). She had started their adoption paperwork, and I was taking the first steps to becoming a foster parent. She even wrote about "walking this road together". As it turns out, I moved quite a bit slower and they have Adrienne, but it still was really sweet of her to reach out to me like that. She also "randomly" emailed me in April while I was taking classes and was at a point where I needed a little reminder about why I was doing it. Angie quickly responded to questions I had about open adoption for a friend of mine, and about things to do in her part of the country when I found myself near there this summer. What a blessing!

And THEN, I was led to more precious babies and their families. Sweet, beautiful people who have reminded me time and again that moments, minutes, hours, and days matter, and should not be taken for granted. Some I learned from and they don't even know. Others I know would be there for me in a heartbeat if I ever asked for prayers. A couple have become more than "blog friends" (although "I'm still Amanda from the Blog"...ha ha, thanks Kristy !) All have blessed me in ways they will never fully know (although I sure did try with this post!)

Blessings upon blessings...Friendships, unexpected, maybe even unlikely...Stories I didn't know existed...Unwavering faith in times that easily could have brought despair and doubt...

(November 30) To think, it all began with a tiny, 5 pound 11 ounce girl named Poppy Joy who spent three hours on Earth one year ago. She lives on in all who who have been blessed to meet her and her precious family.

I have included dates in this post so maybe that will explain a little bit of the "disjointedness". I will admit that I had great expectations for this post considering it has been in "the works" in my head for weeks. I am not sure my words have been able to fully capture the magnitude of all that I am feeling in my heart. I suppose my heart knows even what my head is unable to tell my fingers to type and go with that!

I have been asked a time or two why I spend time reading "sad blogs" when I deal with sickness and death in the work that I do. It is hard to explain to people, but while there are definitely sad times, look how much I have learned! And I know for certain that my faith has grown stronger this past year and I wouldn't trade that for anything...

So, today, I am remembering Poppy Joy, thanking God for her life, and all the blessings that have happened because she lived. Prayers to her family, as they surely are missing her even more today.

Getting in the Spirit

So, the other evening, I had an "email conversation" with Emily . She, I mean "it was" decided that I should make a playlist of Christmas music. I contemplated trying to get Kristy to make one... However, it isn't like I didn't have the time to try and make one (plus, you know, it was MY idea!), so I went for it! It took me a while trying to get a good mix of songs and artists. I am definitely open to requests because it wasn't THAT hard to do! I hope everyone who visits my blog enjoys the music. For some reason, I am having trouble with my speakers (recall I had to send my computer away in March to get the speakers fixed and it took me until today to get everything back the way I like it...argh!) so can't even listen to my own playlist.

I have not put out any Christmas decorations in three years. I have a tiny tree from when I lived in an apartment, but even that one didn't make it out. Last week, I found an artificial tree on sale and decided I wanted to have a full-size tree this year. Today, I turned it from this:

To this:

I need to fix some of the holes and buy some lights. I think I have some ornaments, but it has been a family tradition to get ornaments every year for Christmas. So, it is likely that I could have "29" ornaments to bring from my parents' house to mine. Maybe tomorrow I will get the rest of my decorations out.
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The wedding yesterday was really nice. Unfortunately, I wasn't very happy with the outfit I chose. Or, more specifically, the choice in shoes. I rarely wear heels because I have bunions and don't enjoy causing myself unnecessary pain. So, I brought along two pairs of flats...not realizing that EVERYONE ELSE would be wearing heels. Of course, it shouldn't matter what "everyone else" wants to do to their feet, but I am by far the shortest person in the family (at just short of 5 feet). I don't normally FEEL that short, but when everyone is wearing heels on top of the fact that I really am short...needless to say, I was really crabby about the fact that I didn't think to at least bring a pair of heels as an "option"...

There were only a couple other incidents of "drama", but overall considering the number of people there, that is pretty good :o) It snowed overnight, so we got the first taste of winter (it didn't snow enough at home for any accumulation).

Thankful It's Over

Warning...still whining!

Today was another not-so-fun day at work. I don't even remember when I started counting down the hours until I was off. I do know that when I sat down around 4:00, it felt like I had stayed up way past my bedtime (which I'm pretty close to now and I still need to pack for tomorrow!) but my bed was no where in sight. I have always enjoyed baby-sitting, but it isn't NEARLY as much fun when your sole responsibility isn't playing with the "babies". Listening to little ones cry all day long because they want love and attention is pretty heartbreaking. Thankfully, that doesn't happen ALL the time, but it definitely got to me yesterday and today. My patience left the building, my nerves were shot, I was exhausted, and ran out of work as fast as I could shortly after 7:30 (well ahead of the rest of my co-workers...). I do not like being like that and there were things that came from my mouth that I am not proud of.

I'm thankful these two days of work are over (although the moments I DID get to spend cuddling are now special memories with this little one) and am looking forward to three days off.

Now, onto packing. I found three options of outfits for the wedding. I really feel like wearing pants, but am not sure how that will go over with "the fam".

Two crabby posts in a row...good thing I'm taking tomorrow off :o)
Good night.

Sometimes "Being Thankful" is Hard

Today I was at work. I have many of the blogs I read on my "Google Reader", so when I check my email, I can also check to see if any of them have been updated. I didn't have enough time to really read any of them in full (and am too tired to do that right now!). However, this seemed to be a theme in the parts that I DID read. There are just some things that happen that it is nearly impossible (or completely impossible...) to be able to be thankful for all aspects of them.

The past couple days I have been working on a post for Monday. The parts I have written have a bit of a "thanksgiving" tone to them. So, that day is coming. Today, I just want to whine and complain...just a warning in case you want to stop reading :o)

Today was the first winter holiday where we have utilized our new "holiday teams". I was really reluctant to buy into this way of scheduling, but I'm thankful the final decision was not mine because I really like it. However, the teams are smaller than the number of people who usually work a given day. This way, we have to work less holidays, but it also means we may end up taking more patients than usual. Since we had quite a few patients and one of our team members is out on leave, it was kind of a crazy day!

Now, I would have been "okay" with a crazy day had I not felt like I was running a baby-sitting service at the same time I was trying to be a nurse. For FOUR hours, not one, not two, but ALL THREE of my patients were left at the nurses' station without their families. I sat at the nurses' desk eating my Thanksgiving lunch (I must say we did an AMAZING job with that...turkey, stuffing, cheesy potatoes, green bean casserole, corn, pasta salad, dinner rolls, pumpkin pie...everything but mashed potatoes and the family!) just looking at these kids and how sad that they were spending a good deal of their Thanksgiving with yours truly. I mean, I'm pretty cool and all, but really?! I was actually pleasantly surprised (okay, possibly "thankful") that two of the families only stayed gone for four hours because I didn't expect to see them the rest of the shift once they left. The other kid's mom called me once in the morning to check in, but never came to visit. Oh, did I mention that none of them has turned two yet?! Okay, okay, I will be fair and write that I'm not giving near enough details to give fair judgment, but it was a very frustrating day.

The one kid cried at least half the day. Being held or given undivided attention were the only things to stop the full out cries. I am "thankful" that it wasn't TOO busy because I had a few opportunities to provide that. This little kid was SO snuggly that I wished I could sit and hold all day long! I did end up resorting to a few rounds of the "Wheels on the Bus" and "If You're Happy and You Know It" (that one even got a little participation!). Too bad there isn't more time to play with the kids because that WAS fun...especially since it stopped the crying!

It was a long and tiring day and I was DREADING going back tomorrow, but found out we will have an extra nurse. So, that is definitely something to look forward to :o)

I did get to talk to my mom and two aunts on the phone, and saw my dad when I stopped over to get left-overs. It was a pretty small gathering for my family because the "big party" will be on Saturday. That will be fun...just have to get through tomorrow :o)

Maybe I got enough of the whiny-ness out so I can work on my other post until I fall asleep. (That is SO weird that I am "working on" a post, but I am!)

Good night.

Thanksgiving Eve

Today I was actually pretty productive around the house (a little bit of motivation from the phrase "company's coming" didn't hurt!) I did five loads of laundry, cleaned the bathroom (the toilet and floor anyway), ran the dishwasher, vacuumed the basement and living room, and moved the piles from the floor to the couch (okay, so not PERFECT, but a SLIGHT improvement!).

My aunt, uncle, and cousins who live in Tennessee stopped by my house on their way to my other relatives' house. They will be having Thanksgiving dinner there tomorrow while I am at work. I need to go make my "cheesy potatoes" for my Thanksgiving dinner at the hospital, so am going to cheat a little and re-post some of my post from last year .

Thank today whom you may not be able to thank tomorrow...
Forgive today whom you may not be able to forgive tomorrow....

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know something, for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary, because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.

Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.

True wealth is the blessings you see in your life.
True wealth is the blessings you give to others.
True wealth is what you give, not what you have or get...

Happy Thanksgiving! I have so much to be thankful for, especially for all the blessings I have received this past year.

Very interesting...

So, I took this quiz last year on December 8 and posted it on my blog (last night I was looking through some things I had written last year around this time). I took the same quiz today and got the same result...very interesting :o)

You are most like: You are Blue
You are cool and soothing, with a hidden spontanious side. You are deeper than most people percieve, and you care a lot for those whom you surround yourself with.
Take this quiz: Which Crayola Box of 8 Color Are You?
Visit Toys For Your Blog.com for more blog quizzes

It Had Potential...

to be a REALLY crazy Monday! I was gearing up for it. I even started getting crabby about it. But, the craziness never really happened (for ME anyway...) It definitely was "a Monday" which typically includes trying to fix things that became "broken" over the weekend, or getting things moving again after the "weekend break" (because, you know, no one is ever sick in the hospital on the weekends!)

At one point of the day, there was a thought that all THREE of my patients would be leaving the hospital today. Yay for them, not so "yay" for me who would then be the nurse for the children who would take over their rooms after they left.

As it turned out, though, only ONE got to leave and that wasn't until after 4:00 (AFTER another nurse had already taken the only new patient we ended up getting today). There was a bit of communication difficulties surrounding the discharge of one of my other patients who should go home tomorrow. The other one had a mother who spent the day at home vomiting, so apparently wasn't QUITE ready to take her child home. Hopefully she is "cured" by tomorrow and that kid will leave too... (I know there are moms out there who have to take care of their children even when they are vomiting, but, you know, apparently this mom is "special"...just kidding because I understand it not being the ideal situation especially considering the needs of this particular child...)

I had my mom pick up a tree for me at a hardware store near her work during her lunch break. Someone had a Sunday paper and I noticed that they had (artificial) trees on sale for $40! I thought that was a good deal! I haven't decorated my house for Christmas in three years and wanted to buy a tree this year. I had no idea how much that cost, and am trying to budget a little bit better. However, I thought it would be nice to be a little more "festive" this year. I'm pretty excited about it...I think I will put it in my basement. I have a little tree that I will probably put in my living room. I have the next two days off, so maybe I will try and make my house look like Christmas is just around the corner :o)

I stayed in bed until the latest possible time this morning. Even with the extra few minutes, I am still feeling pretty tired and it is barely 10:30! I think I need to take my car in for a little winter "check up" tomorrow or Wednesday. I'll have to wake up early to call and see if that will work for them. I believe I may need new tires which kind of stinks. My car is five years old, but has less than 27000 miles on it...so, I'll have to find out if it is age or miles that determines the need for new tires :o)

Good night.

Too Old for This?!

I've never really been a "party girl"...high school, college, after college...never. I DO enjoy having a good time, but I am much more comfortable hanging out and talking than going to bars and dancing (pretending I am a ballerina dancing around my living room does not count :o) ). However, once the day arrived for my cousin's bachelorette party, I was determined to have a good time (I remember going to Vegas with some girlfriends four years ago and regret not trying to enjoy myself a little more.)

When the four of us (my sister, two cousins, and I) arrived at the downtown loft that would be our "home base" and sleeping place, our feelings changed a bit. How in the world were 21 people going to sleep in this place with ONE bathroom?! I really was wondering what was going to happen if anyone had themselves a little too much to drink and tied up the bathroom!

After appetizers, gift opening, and introductions, we hopped on a "party bus"...oh my, this is going to be fun!

The four of us rode up together.

My red shoes (take me home...just kidding!)

On the bus.

We took the bus to another part of town to our first bar. Let the evening of dancing begin! My sister doesn't really like to drink, and she and her husband are trying to have a baby, so was drinking water. However, she is SO fun that I really don't think anyone knew she didn't even have a sip of alcohol the entire night. I decided I wasn't so sure about that bathroom situation and we didn't know very many of the people, so I just had one drink at that first bar and that was it. At our second bar, in the middle of dancing, my sister said something about her knee hurting and I realized that mine was a bit sore as well...what is wrong with us?! When we walked into the third bar, my sister said "Holy Country!" which was HILARIOUS because it did kind of look like a barn. By this time, it was after midnight and we had about had it, so found a table to sit at until everyone else was ready to go. There were "big plans" to hit a few more bars, but pretty much everyone was "done" by then (a couple of us because we were tired the others, well, you know..."done")

Of COURSE my sister and I decided to throw in an extra pizza and everyone else went to bed. So, we had to stay up until THAT was done around 2:45. "Only" seventeen people spent the night, and I guess I should be thankful that MY spot wasn't on the hardwood floor in the hallway (three girls slept there). My "spot" was a 63 inch space between the back of a couch and a wall. Now, I'm just under 60 inches tall, so SOMETIMES this was manageable without my feet being on the wall, or my head pushed into the back of the couch, but mostly I was curled up. I had my sister on one side and a cousin on the other...all of us hoping that no one would step on us.

I actually think I slept more than my sister did, but it still wasn't a very comfortable night of sleep. I could barely stand when it was time to get up because my entire body ached! I felt SO old! We weren't so sure why our BICEPS were sore, but all of us in the car on the way home commented that they were.

Anyway, that was the night in a nutshell...I'm thinking that if last night was any indication, the wedding reception next weekend could be a pretty crazy party

I made it home around 1:00 and, even though I rested in the car, I HAD to take a nap (on the couch, so a step up from the floor, but not quite like my bed!). My parents came over later and together we filled EIGHTEEN bags of leaves! Add that to the six I did a couple weeks ago...I guess my dad was correct that my house has LOTS of leaves! But, now it's done and my body has another reason to be angry with me!

I did take a bath and was in my pajamas at 6:30 (oh, that is SO wrong!). I could have gone to bed as soon as I was finished with dinner, but decided to make a few phone calls and unload the dishwasher. I noticed there are 10 people scheduled to work tomorrow (usually we need 8). So, I'm thinking it may be nice to have an "unexpected day off"...those days seem to be the ones that I get things done (kind of like a "snow day" only without the snow which is even better!)

Well, maybe I will be able to do a few more things before I go to bed seeing as it is ONLY 9:30 (what will I do when I actually AM old?!).

Good night :o)

If you can't say anything nice...

you shouldn't say anything at all.

Well, I don't think I really remembered this the past couple days (or, just decided to ignore that little fact). I was thankful to have that story to share on Thursday so I didn't write about my day at work. I nearly wrote some things last night about yesterday, but decided I should "sleep on it" before posting things I would regret.

While I don't use any names, and only those folks I actually "know" are aware of where I live and work, I still need to be cautious about the things I write here. So, since I did more than my share of "venting" at work the past two days, I decided I could wait until this morning. The past two days, I worked with one of the rudest, snottiest mothers I have dealt with in quite a while. This made me sad because I consider myself to be a "liker of the moms", but I just was not feeling it with her. It was heartbreaking to look into the eyes of the dad who seemed to be the much more fit parent, but because he is "the dad" had to let his child go with the mother (pretty much at her mercy for when he is allowed to see his child). It was SO hard to watch that. While I don't think the child is in any "danger" being with her, I think the child would be top priority in the eyes of the father, but probably not for her.

I guess some days are more difficult than others, but at the end of the day, I still love my job. I pray that God will protect this child.

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Well, tonight is "the big night"...my cousin's bachelorette party. I stayed in bed until 10, with hopes that I will be able to make it into the wee hours of the morning without being a crabby party pooper :o) I suppose I should go shower since I still need to go out and buy some tights (and maybe a little jacket or something since my dress does not have sleeves!)

I can't remember the last time I posted in the day time, so I will have to say "good day" instead of "good night". A night without my computer...whatever will I do?! ha ha...hopefully I don't miss anything too exciting!

Speechless

Tonight, I was grateful that the cell phone company was able to transfer the "contacts" from my old phone to my new one. Many of those people I haven't talked to in a LONG time, or only talked to once or twice. I would have accepted a text message or phone call from someone I didn't know, but it was SO nice to know that it was THIS little boy's mom who was "texting" me.

You can read what I have written about him here .

I have been thinking about his mom, and have actually talked about her and him pretty recently. I had made a mental note to sit down one of my days off and send her a card. Her initial text message asked for my email address. I let her know in my response that I had been thinking a lot about her and wondering how she was doing. She found out today that she is two weeks pregnant, but she isn't planning to tell her family for a couple weeks... She took the time to let ME know and that just leaves me speechless. I'm not sure if that was her original "plan", but I just checked and she has not yet sent me an email. She and her husband had been trying to get pregnant for quite a while before her son passed away, so this is exciting news. This is so heartwarming to me that I am someone she chose to share this news with...sure, I was there on the worst day of her life, but I never imagined that I would be included in other events of their life. It brings tears to my eyes because it clearly show that little things can make a huge impact...special moments and memories have lasting effects...

(I wasn't going to write anything tonight because I need to fix something for lunch tomorrow, but this was too much not to have it recorded.)

Good night.

Gratitude

"Give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way."~Native American prayer

A year ago at this time , I attended a retreat called "A Time to Be Grateful". As I wrote last year, it was a REALLY good experience. So, when I had the opportunity to attend that retreat again this year, I jumped at the chance. Looking back on some things I wrote last year around this time, I am in a little bit of a different place, but some things remain the same. And, taking time to reflect on the blessings in life isn't something you can do TOO often!

I definitely was not disappointed, and all of us thought the six hours went by WAY too fast! This year, there were thirteen women, and again I was dubbed "the young one" (although I WAS quick to let them know that I am, in fact, 29 years old, so not nearly as young as I look!). There was a different facilitator this year, so the format was slightly different. There were four sessions, and time in between them to do whatever we needed to do to continue our prayer, reflection, etc.

The first session was "Gratitude for the Past Happenings of Life". That session opened with the song "All Good Gifts" from Godspell which I hadn't heard since high school, but has beautiful lyrics. After some group prayers, discussion, and scripture (Psalm 92), we closed with a reflection called "Be Still" and given time to think. There were some optional reflective questions regarding blessings from our childhood and those challenges of the past. I spent about 30 minutes doing that, and then I went outside.




It has been SO cold recently, but today God blessed us with a day that was nearly 60 degrees with barely a cloud in the sky. I don't spend nearly as much time outside as I should, so it was nice to have this opportunity with nothing to hold me back. The first thing I noticed was how blue the sky was. You could see the moon, which was really cool to me. I tried to capture it in the first picture, but it didn't quite work, but it may be visible in the third one. The second photo is of a little reflection area. I decided to keep on walking, but if there would have been more time, I think I would have liked to have sat in there. I sat down by the water for a while watching as the wind made little ripples and listening to the birds. I walked back to get my things and stood under a tree watching some little birds fly around. They almost looked like hummingbirds because they were so small, but I wasn't QUITE quiet enough to be able to capture a photo.

The Second Session was "Looking at the Struggles and Challenges of Life". During this session, we were given time to have quiet reflection on hardships and struggles we have experienced and what we have gained from them. During the "invitation to share", I told the story of the man and the crosses that I heard last week. That story has touched me so much that I cannot stop thinking about it. I really wish I were an artist, because I have would love to have an actual visual of how I see that story in my life (instead of just the visual that is in my head!). We had a shared prayer and another song before given time to ourselves before lunch. We were given a paper with some suggestions for what we could do during this "down time" including some scripture resources on gratitude. So, I spent that time reading through some suggested Psalms and a reading from 1 Chronicles before it was time to eat.

After lunch, I walked the labyrinth which is SUCH a great experience. If there is anyone reading this who is ever given the opportunity to walk one, TAKE the opportunity! Last year, my labyrinth reflection included the fact that it forced me to slow down. We walked it as a group, so that was extra important! This time, I walked it alone. One of the other women reflected that while on the labyrinth, it looks like you are getting close to the center, and then all of a sudden you are really far away. If you try to step over into another path, you will definitely be lost, and maybe even headed in the wrong direction. Today, I didn't feel like I had THAT much time because I didn't want to miss the next session. However, I also knew that I needed to take my time, so wasn't going to rush. I did realize, though, that you couldn't really look very far ahead. The path ahead was windy and unknown, and there really wasn't any kind of clue as to how much further I would need to go. Looking ahead didn't really show me where I was going, so I was forced to remain in the moment, one foot in front of the other, taking time so as not to stumble on the rocks beside the path. It also really wasn't that helpful to look back because those twists and turns became part the past rather quickly...I had already overcome them and moved forward, and turning back wouldn't make it any easier to get to the end. When I reached the center, I stood on a rock and breathed in the cool autumn air. I listened as the gentle breeze moved the trees, and occasionally picked up enough to rustle the fallen leaves. I think I learned a LOT from that walk alone and am especially grateful that it was warm enough in November to do it without even needing to wear a jacket!

The third session was "Gratitude for all that is". This session kind of focused on "the moment" and we focused on autumn. We did a guided meditation that actually sort of worked for me (I'm not usually very good at those!) During this quiet time, I went to one of the private rooms with a cup of tea. The suggestions for reflection were about the people in my life and how they bless me, my personal interests/talents/skills/resources and how they affect the person I am, how lucky am I, etc. There were tears at different points all day long, but during this time, I took out a book I was given recently by a special friend. All I had to do was open the front cover to see the words she had written and the tears came in full force. Such a blessing (one of the blessings I reflected on earlier in the day was grateful for tears, for the ability to cry, grateful that I was never told that tears were not okay). I continue to be amazed by the wonderful people God places in my life to remind me to take nothing for granted.

The fourth and closing session basically gave all of us an opportunity to share what we learned today. It was really neat to hear how differently each of us was affected by the events of the day. One of the women had recently lost her husband of 47 years, another woman was here from out-of-state with her husband watching their grandson since their son is a "single dad" deployed overseas. There was a woman who is a recent "empty-nester" whose daughter is getting married next summer. A woman whose parents both died shortly before her wedding twenty years ago reflected on all the "Elizabeth's" and "Ann's" God has blessed her with to help fill that void (Elizabeth being Mary's older cousin who went through the pregnancy experience with her, and Ann being her mother.)

It was such a special day, as I knew it would be. That retreat center has retreats throughout the year, as well as opportunities to go out there individually or with your own group, so I may need to do that some time.

Give thanks for everything you have,
For everything you receive,
And for everything you are going to receive,
Never cease to give thanks,
For this positive attitude towards life--
The very act of giving thanks--
Draws the best out of you,
Helps to keep your heart and mind open;
Helps to keep your awareness expanding.
The more blessing you count,
the more they increase.
~adapted from a poem by Eileen Caddy

"All good gifts around us, are sent from Heaven above, so thank the Lord, oh thank the Lord for all his love..."

Well, I guess I should take some time to do a little "tidying up" since I was gone all day...back to work tomorrow (I DID go to the store to get a pair of shoes and a strapless bra to go along with my "little black dress"...not feeling SO grateful about spending money that way, but I guess I will wear them again, so that is something to be thankful for!)

Good night.

A little upgrade

Well, this is going to be kind of a "boring" post since it is after 11 and I need to finish doing some laundry. I wanted to be a little more insightful about the day, but this is "all I got"...

I went and worked out this morning before going to lunch with a friend. She is about 25 weeks pregnant and it is SO great! She had a couple miscarriages this past year, so I have been praying a lot for this little one. So far everything is going well with her pregnancy, and we had a really nice visit.

After that, I went and bought a new cell phone. My old one was having some "issues" after being dropped a few too many times. The people at the store actually laughed at my phone (as they did before I bought this one!) because it is "so old" in the world of cell phones. I only use it to make phone calls and send text messages. I share a plan with my parents, and we do not pay for internet access. So, I didn't really need a phone with all the "bells and whistles", so almost bought another "plain Jane" kind of phone that wouldn't cost me much at all. However, I decided to "splurge" a little bit and do a little upgrade. Maybe one day I will convince my parents that I need to be able to access Google from my cell phone, but in the mean time, I am content just trying to figure out how to use the features I have :o)

That is NOT good! Um, a "little" broken... Nice upgrade :o)

Little did I know that would not be the only "expense" of the day! My cousin is having a bachelorette party on Saturday. The attire is "little black dress" and my sister and I are none too thrilled by that. I DO own a black dress that I haven't tried on in a long time, so am not sure if it still fits. My sister does not have a dress that is black. Neither of us really had the "extra funds" to purchase a dress for this occasion. But, it is our cousin, so we tried. I ended up finding one that was on sale for less than $40, and maybe I will be able to wear it again soon. We also had to get a gift (we did split the cost of that, but was still nearly $30 each).

Oh well, I guess it's "only money" and that's why I have a job, right?!

Tomorrow I am going to a retreat, and I'm REALLY excited about it! So, I'd better go check my laundry and head to bed.

Good night.

A Face of Hope

It is hard to believe that the baby looked even sicker than that pre-transplant. And, the second photo isn't him at his sickest either. I think he was still getting dialysis when the third photo was taken (they took the ventilator out of the room shortly after the photo was taken.) The last picture was taken on Thursday, just two days before he left for home.

I first met "the baby", and his precious mom, on April 4 . Pretty amazing that the first meeting was so important to me that I felt it important to document that date. Little did I know where it would go from there. The next time I posted, it was this . On April 10 time seemed to be running out. On that day, I journaled "maybe God's plan involves getting him new organs in perfect time...or maybe not...time will tell, but for now she is spending all the time she can with her precious baby, and reminding me not to take any moment for granted." Two days later , I attended a women's retreat on "Hope", which was something I really needed to do for myself during that time. The day after that , his parents took my car to the Cathedral...the baby received "the call" for transplant, and went into surgery the following afternoon. He had a very rough road, but was discharged from the hospital on July 7 ! He was very sick again in September, but made an amazing recovery . He celebrated his first birthday, along with many "firsts" that many didn't think would ever happen. And now, he is HOME!

The transplant road has it's many ups and downs, but for now he is home and able to enjoy life surrounded by his family. A life given to him because someone chose to donate their child's organs during the most difficult time in their lives. The Gift of Life, the Gift of Time, a Face of Hope.

___________________________

Well, that's a little better than my original idea to write about how whining sometimes works :o) I was hoping for a day off so I could sleep in again (and MAYBE do some things around the house too!). I did work today, but ended up switching tomorrow for Thursday, so have tomorrow off! Hopefully I will be able to have lunch with a friend. We had scheduled for Thursday and she didn't have her calendar when I had to decide, so I hope it works out!

Good night!

Energy Spurt

Today was my one day off in the middle of four work days. After the past couple days, I was wishing I had tomorrow off too because I knew I was going to be gone most of the day. It STILL would be nice to have tomorrow off, but today was surprisingly productive!

I was able to sleep in pretty late since I didn't have to be at church until 10:30. So, I got some extra rest that felt great (I was starting to feel a sore throat coming on, but it was pretty much gone by the time I rolled out of bed!) I even had time to eat breakfast and drink some coffee before church...nice morning!

My mom's company was a sponsor for a basketball game today. So, my parents, my sister, my cousin, her friend, and a friend of my dads all went to the game this afternoon. It was a really exciting game and our team won after being behind most of the game. I had dinner with my parents before heading home.

It was dark (darn daylight savings time) and I was feeling a little sleepy. But, it was ONLY 7:30, so it wasn't like I could go to bed! I decided that there was PLENTY of night left for me to do some things around the house. I washed a couple loads of laundry and put away the dishes since I ran the dishwasher earlier in the day. Then, I decided that since it has been really cold for a few weeks and I don't have any more vacations to warm-weather places planned, it would be safe to put away clothes that are strictly for the summer (I am a hot-blooded person, so the short sleeves have to be available year-round!). I also proofread the minutes from one of my meetings so they could be sent out to the rest of the staff. I sent a few emails, and now it is nearly 10:30...I think that is an okay time to go to bed :o) A little energy spurt and I got quite a bit accomplished in a short amount of time!

Back to work tomorrow... Good night!

The Power of Suggestion

A friend of mine has had recent success losing weight/inches by using a particular product. It sounds like a really good plan, but I REALLY am not sure I have the willpower to do it. I have been thinking about it for a few weeks, though, and thought I was pretty close to just "going for it", or at least giving it a try! It is something I will have to work into my budget and with Christmas coming, I'm not sure when it will work out. But then I think maybe I should MAKE it work. I am still undecided, but it has been on my mind quite a bit.

So, then yesterday and today were pretty slow days at work. I could NOT stop eating! NOTHING seemed to make me feel full. I was hungry ALL the time! I ate cake, cookies, candy, crackers with peanut butter. I just finished some ice cream. I got up early today so I could go get a Starbucks Peppermint Mocha before work. I don't even KNOW what else (because that was just some of the stuff I ate in ADDITION to my meals!)

Just thinking about cutting back on calories and eating healthy turned me into a ravenous beast (in case someone "new" is reading this, there is zero chance of pregnancy, unless I missed that dream...just kidding :o) ). It was absolutely crazy (and a little annoying too!) I was drinking as much water as I could, but that only worked because I wasn't too busy to take the million bathrooom breaks that are required when one puts that much fluid into her body (I am not one of those nurses who can hold it all day, I can barely wait five minutes!)

Totally random, but that was my day...eat, eat, eat. Thankfully, I did get the one and only admission so I had a little work to do this evening. I worked with the nurse who probably annoys me the most of any of my co-workers along with one to can drive me crazy at times. So, I made a few trips to "the other side" (and VERY frequent trips to the bathroom!), enjoyed the visits from the charge nurse and was thankful for the nursing assistant who helped maintain a "buffer" so hopefully no one had their feelings hurt. I don't feel very kind saying those things, and it really shouldn't make me feel any better that "others" say things that are much more unkind than I did...but she is SO frustrating to work with! We all made it through, and I have tomorrow off :o)

My mom made potato soup, so I stopped by after work and ate with her. We had a nice visit, and the soup was yummy (plus it was already cooked for me!)

It may be another "early to bed" night. I felt pretty darn good this morning after getting that little extra bit of sleep last night :o) I was freezing cold all day long, which is CRAZY since I am usually hot at work. I'm freezing now too, but don't think I'll do anything with the thermostat since I have a few blankets in my bedroom.

Good night!

Tiny Request Granted

I stayed in bed as long as I could before getting up to get ready for work. I did a lot of stuff this week, including some things that took a little emotional energy. No regrets about any of that, but not being able to rest after my blood donation yesterday did not help my energy level. I have never called in sick, I thought we were short a nurse today, and 6:00 is WAY too late to call in anyway. So, as I walked across the street from the parking garage to the door of the hospital, I thought how nice it would be if today was a slow day. Not necessarily a "prayer" for a quiet day, just thinking that would help me get through it a little easier :o)

My patients were assigned for me when I got there. (I had already decided I'd be okay with whatever came at this point, but still hoping it wouldn't be a crazy day!) I was put on a side of the unit I haven't been on since before my vacation, so it was a nice change. I was only given two patients, so figured I would be the first one to get an admission. As it turned out, I never did get an admission. And, both of my patients were REALLY easy. One was a baby who slept all day except when she needed to eat...and I only had to do that once since there was a nursing assistant and a nursing student who did the other feedings. The other one had a mom there for most of the day except when he took a nice long nap. I definitely have NO complaints about that! The "other side" was CRAZY busy all day long, so things definitely worked out the way I wanted them too, even though I was a tiny bit disappointed to "change sides".

So, I checked my email a million times, read some blogs, checked on my facebook, read the news online, and ate a lot of junk food to try and stay awake :o)

I think it is kind of funny that this was my "Quote of the Day" today--"The harder I work, the luckier I get." ~Samuel Goldwyn--There definitely was a little bit of "hard work" going on this week, so I was lucky to get a tiny request granted :o)

Well, it isn't even 10:00, but I am thinking I should get ready for bed. I am used to turning off my lights at 11, but I don't think I can count on two quiet days in a row!

Good night.

400

I can hardly believe this is my FOUR HUNDREDTH post! In 2007, I only posted 100 times, so either I found some things to say 2008 or maybe posting regularly became more of a nightly ritual (or habit...). It has been fun looking back at what was happening in my life at certain times. I have done that with my journals a couple times, but it is a lot easier looking through typed posts :o)

I have written about sad times, and happy times. Times where I was taught lessons I will never forget, given perspectives on life that have forever changed me. Of course there were times that I wrote about nothing just because I felt I "needed" to write something. There has been a time or two that I have regretted what I have written, or looked back and thought I was crazy for thinking certain things. All in all, I think blogging has been a good outlet for my thoughts. I am, however, kind of glad that the outlet for my thoughts has not become a place where hundreds of people come to read them. I'm not quite ready for that!

Of the 400 posts, 187 of them have been labeled "work". I guess since I currently consider my "job" as my "life work", that makes sense. I love my work, and it is a HUGE part of my life, and so that is what I write about (and, also why I have had to make this blog a little more "private" and be careful about details...). Family and friends are close second and third to work in terms of "labels". Now, I am POSITIVE that family and friends are NOT more important to me than work, but maybe work has more interesting stories. :o) Actually, it probably is more due to the fact that writing about work is a good way to "debrief". Being able to sort through my feelings and emotions enables me to continue to do what I do the way I want to do it. I am happy that these things are documented, even if they are just for myself. It has been helpful for me to go back and read about how I dealt with certain situations, and to see how much I have grown and changed.

Well, I had hoped to have something fabulous to say on this, my 400th post (that's why I didn't post yesterday...I was too tired after a busy day at work to think that much!). But, I suppose since this blog is called "Do I have anything to say?"...this may be as "fabulous" as it gets :o)
_______________________
Today I did a stem cell donation for research. I think this is the fifth or sixth time I have done this. It really is for a good cause, but this time I don't really feel that well after doing it. I started later in the day than usual, so the four hour donation went through the lunch hour. It is hard to balance between how much to eat or drink because once I am hooked up, I cannot move for four hours (having to go to the bathroom halfway through does NOT make it any easier!) They checked my blood pressure in the middle and at the end, both of which were pretty low. So, maybe I am still trying to adjust from that. I am definitely going to try to go to bed early!

I went to a late lunch with my friend and the baby. They are going to be headed home this weekend. I did take a picture, but may wait to post it until they are actually on the road. I wish I had a copy of the picture we took when we thought he wasn't going to make it to transplant. I may be able to find a picture from that time, just not one with me in it :o) It is so wonderful to see what God has done for him, and for them. (When I post the picture, I'll have to do some links to previous posts about him, because the story is amazing!)

Well, I'd better get ready for bed. And, just because I am SUPER EXCITED for her, Kristy just got a blog makeover that is SO cute...go check it out :o) Great work Nikki!

Bearing Crosses

Today, a friend shared a story she read recently that really spoke to her (she obviously was touched by it enough to share it with me!) She may end up sharing the story as well, but I think she would be okay if I do too.

Not sure if I will tell it as well as she did, but here it is:
There was a man who was carrying this HUGE cross. He did not think he could carry it any longer. So, he told God he just couldn't do it any more. God told the man he could go into a room full of crosses and pick a different one to carry. When the man entered the room, he saw TONS of crosses, REALLY big ones. Finally, way in the back he found a small cross. He told God that he wanted to choose that one. God told the man it was the same one he had left behind.

Wow!

She then told me how this story impacted her and really put things into perspective. For me, it put things into perspective, but in a different way.

My own cross is SO small. I don't know why God has blessed me like that, but it is true. In fact, on most days, I could probably carry my cross in one hand, sometimes maybe as easily as a potato chip between two fingers. Of course, it may have taken me a while to realize how blessed I am, but the whole time I was listening to the story, this is where my mind went. For "whatever reason" (I have an idea or two!), right now in my life, God has decided to give me a small cross. I know He can choose to change that at any moment, and I will learn to be okay with it if that happens (or at least find some way to deal with whatever comes my way! He has also decided to bless me with wonderful people in my life!)

Even though this story really put things into perspective for me in a concrete way today, I think deep down I already knew this. Because God has given me such a little cross, I have an amazing opportunity to help make the crosses of others feel a little lighter. I can BE a "stretcher bearer". I can "carry mats". I can catch people from falling, or pick them up if they do, putting my cross in my pocket if I need both hands... I can, because He has done this for me. He has blessed me, so that I may be able to bless others.

This is the most wonderful feeling and it just brings tears to my eyes. Some people say I have been given a "gift". If that is indeed the case, then "by golly" I'm going to use it! :o) What I do know is that I have been blessed beyond measure. Sometimes I don't even consider what I do as blessing people, because I really just do what comes natural, or "feels right". If, however, that feels like a blessing to them and I can pay forward some of what I have been blessed with, then that is "bonus".

In any case, gift or not, I am who I am because God made me this way, and has given me so many people to teach me how to love and care for others. He has given me people to remind me to find blessings in the little things, and perspective on how great my life truly is.

Prayers to all those people who are feeling their cross is too hard to bear, that they may be blessed with someone to help lighten the load. Prayers too that they know Jesus is always there.

Good night.

The Leaves

So, yesterday at dinner my dad says to me "So, I drove by this house and it had SO many leaves in the yard it was unbelievable!" I responded, oh, was it the house on the corner of __ and Pine?! Yep, that would be MY house with the millions of leaves! He asked if I wanted to hire someone to rake them because he wasn't really interested in helping with that effort. I didn't really think that was necessary, but that meant I had to be the one to do it (oh, the joys of being a homeowner!)

I slept in which was really nice, but got up in time to go work out. A lady from the state called me to update my profile in their system in regards to foster parenting. She has called previously and left messages, but I never called her back because I am working through an agency that is kind of separate from the state. She asked me a bunch of questions and almost made it so I was too late to go work out (the Curves I go to closes from 11-3 because no one really goes between those hours). I was annoyed by that, plus she was asking me questions that I didn't really want to answer. She almost made me feel like I was wasting their time because I wasn't sure about what kinds of kids, or what I was really willing to do. The girl that I have been working with understands where I am and is okay with that. I CAN'T explain what "my plans are" because really, I'm leaving that to God right now. I don't have my heart set on this or that because in black and white on paper, I'm not even SURE if this is the right time to take the leap into motherhood. I have NO idea what kind of kid God would think I would be a good mom for. I just don't know! I knew it was the right time to take classes. It was the right time to get licensed. I didn't want "the right kid" to come along and not be able to do anything about it. I know my heart is big enough to be a foster mom right now, and my home definitely is. The other details I haven't actually taken the time to figure out because I just don't know. The woman said I sounded like I would be a good foster mom, but basically I needed to get my act together and figure some things out. I didn't really like that, but maybe she is right, I don't know. I put in a call to the girl at my agency, but said I would call her back and I forgot until it was after business hours. I'll have to try and call her tomorrow...

Anyway, I made it to Curves and saw a friend I hadn't seen in MONTHS! We got to chat while we worked out which was great! She must have had a busy day planned because she didn't even ask about going for coffee afterwards, which we have done quite a few times. Maybe next time!

When I got home, I talked on the phone to another friend I hadn't heard from in a while. It was good timing, actually, because she's had some things going on in her life, and needed some extra prayers today/tomorrow. So, it was great to know that BEFORE rather than AFTER. Sending prayers :o)

I watched TV for a while, and called yet another friend before I decided I should not stall on my leaf raking project any longer. It was in the thirties with ice pellets coming down at that point, but not getting any warmer, so I went for it! I spent less than an hour and a half raking (the ice pellets stopped and it was dry for a while, but was raining pretty good by the time I stopped) but filled three leaf bags and three garbage cans. So, I'd say that was pretty good work considering I was working alone...who needs to pay someone?! (Now, cleaning out my gutters, on the other hand, is definitely not a project for me, myself, OR I!)

I took a nice long bath to warm up and soak my muscles after my raking experience. That was really nice (and a great way to avoid doing any household cleaning...I HAD to take a bath, right?!).

Honestly, I'm not sure what I did the rest of the day. I did cook dinner, but attempted to make spaghetti sauce before realizing I didn't have very much tomato sauce. So, it kind of tastes like tomato paste, but it DOES have Italian sausage in it, so I ate it (I made a TON, so I guess that's what I'll be eating for a few days, even though it is a little more on the icky side than the majority of things I have cooked!) I have a meeting tomorrow morning, and my last Bible Study session tomorrow night. I'm actually not that tired, but AM a little chilly, so am thinking about getting into bed with a bunch of blankets and a book :o)

Good night!

Special Memories

Today was a really good day off!

Turning the heat on just enough to keep the chill out made for PERFECT sleeping temperature! I was SO comfy cozy in bed that it was hard to get up, even at 9:45! My sister called me at 10 to see what our plans were going to be for the day. I was still in my PJs and still had to shower before 11:00 church!

After church, I talked to one of the members of our Young Adult group that really hasn't done anything as a group in nearly a year. There are TONS of young people, especially young families in my parish, but none of us who are in the "group" are really event planners. It is unfortunate that this is kind of untapped territory, but I am not sure I am the one to get things going. We did pick a day to go out for brunch after church, so hopefully we will have a good turnout for that. Then, maybe we can figure out some other ideas for what we want our group to do.

I had brunch at mom and dad's before going out with my sister. She wants to make a scrapbook for her friend's baby, but has never done any scrapbooking. So, she asked for my help. We went to a couple stores, but didn't find exactly what we were looking for (she left a message for our aunt who sells scrapbook stuff, so hopefully she will call back and get us what we want!). Scrapbooking isn't really all that relaxing for me. Apparently, it is rather stressful for my sister too, but we did okay for about an hour before we decided to quit for the day. Her friend hit the 25-week mark, but is only measuring a little over 23 weeks. We went and visited her before dinner. She is in really good spirits, but that little one needs lots of prayers. Hopefully she will stay inside and continue to grow and get stronger.

It had been a while since I hung out with my sister, so that made for a special day.

After dinner with my parents and sister, I headed back to the hospital (I know, I LOVE that place a little too much...well, it isn't so much the PLACE, but the people there!) I wasn't planning to stay long, but you know, that whole love to talk thing :o) I was there for a little over two hours, but it was SO much fun! (If I was someone else, I probably would think it is a little nutty to go to the hospital on your day off to play. But, I AM myself and I wouldn't change a thing!) Such special memories that will be forever treasured. My heart is full of joy, hope, love, and more from this time spent together. It was SO great! Plus, I received a very thoughtful gift that is a tangible reminder of this day (and the past few weeks, and a few other times!)

I am so blessed...and am SO grateful that God has brought people into my life to remind me about how very blessed I truly am.

Great day, and I'm off tomorrow, so it will be a great night too!

A Little Chilly

The strong winds of mid-week blew away the warm temperatures from the beginning of the week. I'm not sure what the temperature outside was, but I DO know that my house was 50 degrees when I got up to get ready for work. I was SO cold last night which made it kind of a restless night of sleep. I REALLY like to cozy up with a blanket and MUCH prefer being chilly to being hot. However, I may have pushed it a LITTLE too far considering I woke up shivering at around 3:30, but didn't have enough sense to get up and turn on the heat (possibly because it was 3:30 in the morning!) I turned the heat on enough to "take the chill out" when I got up, and warmed up the bathroom with little heater so I wouldn't become an ice cube after my shower. I'm sitting here in my living room now, just a little bit on the chilly side, but I think it will be a comfortable sleeping temperature :o)

Somehow I have gotten my days confused. I was reading a blog that said something about "yesterday" referring to it as a "weekend day". It took me quite a while to realize that, yes, yesterday was FRIDAY, today was Saturday. That would mean that tomorrow is SUNDAY...it doesn't feel like it at all, but hopefully now that I have typed those words, I will remember to go to church!

Work was fine today. I got there early (had to get out of my freezing cold house...ha ha!) to pick my patients. I took three different patients than I had yesterday, but did get to choose them, which made me happy. It was a good day, although quite a bit busier than Saturdays usually are. I stayed after work to visit with my friend and her husband again for a while. Hopefully they didn't mind, but they will probably go home before I work again, so I had to get a little extra talking in before that :o) When I got home, I called one of my other friends, the baby's mom, to see how she was doing. They are heading home next week, so we made lunch plans for Thursday. It is AWESOME seeing these kids get well enough to leave here, especially when they arrive so critically ill that you wonder if they will live to get to that point. Definitely puts things into perspective.

Well, I'm thinking I may grab an extra blanket since my bedroom is usually colder than the living room, and head to bed.

Good night!

More talking

Maybe not QUITE as much as yesterday, or maybe JUST as much...hard to tell!

My patients I was hoping to get had already been "snatched up" by the time I got there, and I wasn't even late! I did get there early enough to at least be on the same side as them so I could go visit. And visit I did...many times! :o)

I sent two patients home, and another nurse sent two patients home. So, both of us had one patient and we hadn't had an admission all day. One of us had to go home. My friend's husband came to town today and was going to get us Chinese food for dinner, so I let the other nurse leave. I took over her patient and she left just as I found out I would be getting an admission...ugh! We actually had to take two, and one more was coming by the time I left, so it will be a pretty busy night for them. My Chinese was yummy, and I got to visit with my friend and her husband for a while after I got off, so it was "all good", and my admission wasn't TOO bad (of course, I did leave some of it for the night shift to finish up...nursing is a 24-hour job, so that DOES happen sometimes!)

Well, I have a "plan" for who I want to take care of tomorrow, but want to get there early enough to not cause a raucous, so I'd better think about heading to bed :o)

I have quite a few friends in need of prayers right now for different reasons... It sounds like the baby will be heading home soon, so prayers for them (I haven't talked to his mom so am not sure when they are leaving). Little E remains very sick. All the people whose "blogs I frequent" listed on the left will always take prayers :o) My friends with the Chinese food are hoping they will be eating closer to home sometime soon, and are requesting prayers for that. My sister's best friend has finished her first week of bedrest and the baby is nearly 25 weeks. They would appreciate prayers. I work in a hospital filled with sick people...so the list could go on and on...

Good night.

Talk Talk Talk

That's what I feel like I did all day. Good thing I like to talk, right?! :o)

I started the day with a meeting at work. I am the chairperson, so am the "meeting leader"...that requires a lot of talking :o) The person who insists on arguing about everything, even if she is agreeing with you was not there, so it made for a MUCH less stressful meeting. One person even said when the meeting was over that her heart rate and blood pressure were still within normal limits...not usually the case when the other individual is present!

Then, I stayed at the hospital and visited with a friend for nearly an hour and a half. I am SO blessed to have her as a friend! Hopefully she will be able to get closer to home soon (which happens to be far away from here...), even though I'll definitely miss talking to her.

After THAT, I went down a couple floors and visited my sister's friend who is in the hospital. She is nearly 25 weeks pregnant with her first baby and is on bed rest (with bathroom privileges!) They are hoping she will be able to make it to 32 weeks. She is in good spirits, even though her husband hasn't been able to visit for a few days since he has been sick. Her mom was there, and I stayed for about an hour. Praying for that little one...I have seen kiddos who have had complications from being born too early and it is not easy. Luckily, she is in an excellent hospital (if I do say so myself!) and has lots of support from family and friends.

I finally got something to eat when I finally got home around 3:00. I threw in some laundry, then ran some errands. I talked to a few people on my errands (the employees at Fashion Bug know me VERY well, I ran into people from church at the book store, and had to talk to the guy at the coffee shop so I could get my mocha :o) ).

Tonight, I had choir practice, but we did so some talking as well as doing a bit of singing. I'm looking forward to actually being able to sing with the choir on Sunday at church!

My parents had a late dinner, so I joined them. And, yes we did a bit of talking. I text messaged with a friend, which isn't EXACTLY talking, but kind of like talking...well, maybe it IS talking since that's how lots of people communicate with each other...

Anyway, lots of talking, not a lot of anything else. Talking is fun. I like to talk...yet, somehow I also enjoy living by myself and being able to choose not to talk to anyone :o)

Back to work tomorrow...I'm sure there will be some talking involved then as well. I'd better rest my mouth :o)

Good night!

I shouldn't...

be on the computer typing because my eyes are tired and giving me a headache. Plus, I have a meeting to prepare for that starts at 9:30. I need decide if I'm going to try and stay awake to finish preparing for my meeting, or force myself to get up early and do it! Either way, I should not be sitting on my couch typing...

I only had two patients today. One of them had a student nurse for most of the day and only had two medications all day and no IV...so, not much to do there. The other one kept me busy for a few minutes at a time, but I did quite a bit of visiting and sitting today. I guess I shouldn't complain, especially the "visiting" part because I DO love to chit-chat :o)

Okay, I wonder if I can organize a little bit, and then make myself finish reading stuff in the morning. I'm not sure I'll be able to make myself get up once I'm all comfy cozy in bed, though...I suppose I should at least figure out how much work I have to do!

Good night.

Number 100

No, not my post number (I will hit the 400 mark some time in the next week!) I was voter Number 100 at my polling place this morning! It was 9:30 in the morning, so that's pretty good voter turn-out, especially since my polling place is pretty small. I didn't have to wait in line, though, so that was exciting. I'm glad I had the day off, because I am not sure how the whole early voting thing worked, and the polls were closed by the time I would have gotten off work. I'm not really "into" politics, and probably wasn't the most informed voter, but I do see the importance in exercising this right...there are people all around the world who would love to have the opportunity to choose their leaders.

I'm not exactly sure what I did the rest of the morning besides send some emails and watch TV! I spent about two hours at the hospital visiting a friend this afternoon. I had Bible Study this evening. I have the TV on now watching "the numbers", but am not sure how long I will stay awake since I have to work tomorrow and I'm already feeling tired.

Prayers for our country as we elect people who will make very important decisions for us the next four years.

Good night.

Well...

I probably didn't need to write anything tonight, because today wasn't that exciting :o) However, I have made this my "journal", and when I had a paper journal, I pretty much wrote every day. So, out of "habit", I will write something (even though I SHOULD be reading something...I have a stack of policies and procedures and practice guidelines to read before my meeting on Thursday...hmm, wonder why I'm NOT doing that!)

I hopped out of bed shortly before 10 since someone was ringing my doorbell and banging on the door. As it turns out, I should have stayed in bed since it was an older woman handing out religious pamphlets...and yes, I DID open the door...but I must have looked tired enough, or annoyed enough, that she handed me the paper and left. I ALMOST drove myself to Curves, but ended up driving around the block and coming back home. I REALLY hope no one saw that :o) I decided to go ahead and mow my lawn instead of raking the first set of leaves. By the end of the day, my lawn was filled with them again, so I think that was a good idea.

I went to lunch with my friend who won the money at the races for calling in her bets. Her two kids joined us, so that was fun. However, I can hardly believe she expected a two and four-year old to sit still while we visited for nearly two hours...they did GREAT! (of course, having a TV over our table turned to cartoons helped!)

I spent the rest of the afternoon...hmm, what DID I do?! I did write some thank yous, and some checks to pay some bills. It was nearly 80 degrees today, so I walked them to the post office. I fought with my computer for a while trying to upload pictures from my trip to facebook so my friends there could see them (I finally won and they are posted now--yay!). I made tater-tot casserole for the first time...I never knew it was that easy!

Okay, maybe I should do some reading before I go to bed. I don't have any plans for tomorrow (besides VOTING!), but in case something unexpected comes up, I should get some work done.

Good night!

I made it...

barely :o) I made it through my third day in a row of working after being off for two weeks. Our census is REALLY low, but it doesn't get that way without a LITTLE work! In the three days I worked, I sent four patients home, got a post-op patient, had an admission, and transferred a patient from one side to the other. I administered two units of platelets. I did a bit of "chit-chatting". Things went pretty darn well, and I ALMOST wish I was working tomorrow to continue the fun (but, I have lunch plans and don't think they need an "extra" nurse considering at least one should get to have the day off!) Late this afternoon, for some reason, I blew a fuse. My blood was boiling and I was burning up from head to toe. Luckily, it wasn't busy, so I was able to sit for a while and take a "chill pill" (and a nice large glass of ice water!) It was so crazy that what this parent said/did got to me the way it did because normally I probably could have laughed it off. However, at that moment, like I said, it sent me through the roof. I suppose maybe it is good for everyone that I have two days off now :o)

This picture was posted on the patient's web site. It isn't THAT much better of a picture, but I think it is cute. She makes a cute little spiderman, with muscles and all :o) Today she "tatooed" me with a lady bug tatoo on my left arm...so fun!

I've had a sore throat the past couple days which is pretty annoying. I've been trying to drink extra water, and will be sure to get some extra rest the next two days (sleep is usually not a problem, especially when I have days off!) I don't really have any other symptoms, so it is probably related to the fact that I was traveling in different parts of the country, the weather has been changing, with temperatures varying quite a bit from day to day, and my sleep was kind of messed up last week. I just hope it doesn't turn into anything else, because patients in the hospital typically don't like it if their nurse sounds sick!

Well, that's about it for today :o) Good night!

Falling Back

So, tonight we turn the clocks back an hour. I'm kind of looking forward to an extra hour of sleep (which I will get unless I decide to stay awake an extra hour!). Apparently, last year I had some "issues" with Daylight Savings Time. Interesting that I was in the midst of a three day stretch at work then as well. I will say that I made some valid points. Too bad this article wasn't available then, although I'm not sure it would have made much of a difference! I also went back and read all of the posts I made last November . Pretty interesting stuff...especially since a lot has happened in a year, but there are also quite a few similarities in what I feel now to what I wrote then. It does seem like I had a pretty emotional November last year, but also did a bit of growing in various aspects of my life.

Well, I was offered the chance to have tomorrow off on more than one occasion. On Thursday when I was at choir practice, I thought that I would take Sunday off if it was offered so I would be able to go to church. However, I decided to say "no thank you" and will go to work for my third day in a row. That is one reason I said "no"--tomorrow will be my third day with one of my patients, so I know her really well. I know what I am getting into and it SHOULDN'T be too bad. I'm thinking I should save my "day off" for a day when I have something exciting planned, or if I have such a yucky day that I don't want to go back the following day if I don't have to :o) I also just had two weeks off, and used three days of PTO. It doesn't accrue very quickly, and is the same as "sick time". I definitely wouldn't be able to afford days off without pay, so probably should try and keep a little PTO cushion :o) PLUS, I get an extra hour of sleep, so getting up early for the third day in a row shouldn't be so bad!

I suppose if I really want to get my extra hour of sleep, I should go to bed now.
Good night!