Do I have anything to say?: It's Just Different

Thursday, December 24, 2009

It's Just Different

It's nearly 5:00 on Christmas Eve. I went to bed early again last night and slept for a very long time. I stayed in my pajamas until around 3:00 when I finally decided to shower (after I wrapped presents and shoveled my driveway). I made myself bow tie noodles and Parmesan cheese. I got a call at 5:00 this morning to see if I could come to work. We "staffed light" with hopes that we wouldn't have many patients. Instead, the hospital is full of sick kids who will spend Christmas there. I'll be there tomorrow doing what I can to try and make Christmas in the hospital "not suck"...yeah, good luck with that, right?!

Not to be a "Debbie Downer", but Christmas is just different these days...it is sort of hard to be joyful when I know of so many people who are hurting, so many kids who are sick, so many people who are missing loved ones. Of course, maybe that all will change in an hour when I head to my grandparents' house and experience Christmas with my nephew for the first time. Christmas IS so much more than a tree and decorations (although, I did get sad when I went searching for my Christmas cookie candles this morning and saw ALL the decorations that never made it out this year). It isn't about getting gifts, but about a gift that was given. Tonight, I'm going to be with those I love the most and that's what will make this Christmas special. I have so much to be thankful for...and I hope that I have, at least in some way "given this Christmas away" and have been "His hands, His feet, His love"

Merry Christmas.

What if I told you
You have the power
To give someone hope
Beyond their wildest dreams
What if I told you
It’s right there in your hands
In your hands

It’s hard to imagine
How something so small
Can make all the difference
Tear down the tallest wall
What if December
Looked different this year
What if we all just

Give this Christmas away
If there’s love in your heart
Don’t let it stay there
Give this Christmas away
And your life will be changed
By the gifts you receive
When you give this Christmas away

It’s feeding the hungry
Serving the poor
It’s telling the orphan
You’re not forgotten anymore
It’s doing what love does
Even when no one’s watching you

Give this Christmas away
If there’s love in your heart
Don’t let it stay there
Give this Christmas away
And your life will be changed
By the gifts you receive
When you give this Christmas away
For God so loved the world
That He gave His only Son
So we could be
His hands, His feet, His love
His love

What if I told you
You have the power
To give someone hope
Far beyond their wildest dreams
What if December
Looked different this year
Yah what if we all just

Give this Christmas away
If there’s love in your heart
Don’t let it stay there
Give this Christmas away
And your life will be changed
By the gifts you receive
When you give this Christmas away

Give this Christmas away
You have the power
Just give it away
Give it away
Give it away
This Christmas
Give it away
Give Christmas away
Give it away

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Privacy Statement

This blog purposefully is left full name and location free out of respect to my family and to my patients/families. Due to the nature of my work, and having foster children in my home, it is important to maintain privacy and confidentiality. All photographs of patients were either given to me by the families or taken with family permission. Thank you for your understanding and support in helping me protect myself and "my people" =) If you have any questions, or want to know more about me, feel free to email me at iloveblogs44 {at} gmail {dot} com.

Who's Who

Updated September 2013

I have one sister who is married and has two boys. "A" was born June 2009 and "I" was born March 2012. We are both really close to my parents and have lots of "family dinners".

I wrote a lot about my patients when I first started this blog. Some patients are still growing and thriving, and others have lost their battles.

My first foster placements lived with me from June 2010-September 2011. They were sisters who were 15 and almost 3 when they were placed with me and are now 18 and 5. I called M "the teen" and L "the little one". They live with their mom who still has many issues, but are doing well (ok) and I still have (not enough) contact with them.

My second foster placement came to me September 6, 2012. I call her Zoe and she turned 5 in April. She has cystic fibrosis and has been a patient on my floor at the hospital. The plan is still reunification.

Ivy is a 17-year-old whose mom died just before Thanksgiving. She has a Guardian, but is unable to live with him due to some family issues. She has no other family who is willing/able to take her. She moved in with me the beginning of February. She moved to a group home at the beginning of August as her needs were too great for me with my schedule and having another child with special needs.