Tears Are Ok

Yesterday I was forced off work again due to low census/being over-staffed. I was forced to stay home three times in June and had to leave early last Friday and on Monday. My last pay check was 12 hours short which is 1/6 of my regular scheduled shifts. The day before yesterday, I knew that I was likely to be forced off yet again. The girls and I ran here there and everywhere as we seem to do (which is fine, but Tuesday seemed to be extra busy!) I had an appointment to see my counselor at 5 and thought the girls would be picked up before 4:30 for their visit (by 4 actually was what I was thinking). So, I offered to bring the older girl's ("M") friend home after they had spent a few hours down town on my way to my appointment (even though it wasn't "on my way") Well, 4:35 rolled around and "M" just told me to go.

I was late to my appointment and was crying by the time I got there (oh, we had spent a great deal of time trying to put together the toddler bed for the little one...it was dropped off to me in a box...nice...good thing I'm "handy", but it was still frustrating to put together!) Good timing for a meeting with the counselor, I guess! Tuesday was extra hot and my car just would NOT cool off. So, I knew that I wouldn't get paid for the next day AND my a/c appeared to be broken...seriously?! Things are going SO well in my life besides financially, but I'm still trusting that things will work out. I have put in a request for the State to pay at least a portion of what I am giving my sister to watch the girls while I work. I am only planning to pay her about $50 a day plus incidentals, but that still takes a good chunk out of what the State will give me. That maybe would be more "ok" if I was actually getting paid to work full-time, but right now I am not.

Anyway, there are going to be forums and I there have been emails from the director, so at least people are looking into this work issue, but it is still pretty stressful!

Tomorrow morning at 7AM, I am dropping off "M" for a weekend at camp. She will return to me at 6PM on Sunday. I've been trying to figure out how she is feeling about this and she isn't giving me a whole ton of feedback (besides she isn't looking forward to bugs!) I know that she is super shy, but this sounds like it will be a good "fit". I told her that when she returns, I want to know the names of two people and three things she learned about them during a conversation (I thought that talking to two people was a manageable goal...ha!) She also is not looking forward to leaving her sister. So, for a few minutes this evening, I had two crying girls and am sure there will be more tears in the morning (any spare prayers are appreciated!) I assured "M" that tears are okay and "L" too, telling her that things will be okay. I had "L" help me make a little 5x7 photo collage with three pictures and made copies for both of them to have. "M" won't tell me that she is looking forward to this weekend, but I really think it will be a good experience for her (I was told it was for teen girls who are or have been in foster care).

Well, I have to be up bright and early too and today was a busy day. We went swimming AND I mowed the lawn, so I'm a little worn out from the sun AND running around :)

Good night.